I should be sleeping, but it's eluding me, so here I am. I tried lying in bed for a while. I found myself thinking about the dynamic of "home" and how important it is, to a woman especially. I wonder how women all over the world endure living in sparse little huts that wash away in fierce storms, or crowded in refugee camps with not an ounce of privacy, or moving around as itinerants. Do they even have any notion of "home"? I suppose if you have your loved ones with you, it's what matters most, and not the physical surroundings. But still, so much of one's sense of "who you are" is tied into a cognition of belonging - having that one place you know is "yours", which you know will continue to be yours, at least for a season. No wonder the elderly struggle so when they have to give up their homes and are confined to one room in a nursing facility. I suspect they lose more than their treasured belongings, more than their independence, but also a bit of their very being. And, what about the homeless? They must wonder at times exactly who they are....
Now you see where my mind goes when I should be sleeping....
We've decided to put an offer out on the 2nd house for-sale-by-owner in our neighborhood. We've drafted the contract and have notified the current owners that we have it all ready to present to them. We are still waiting to hear back from them informing us of a good time to get together. Here's hoping they are really serious about selling. We think it's a strong offer, but who knows? One thing I've learned is that you can't predict what's going to happen, you can't just make your future and circumstances conform to what you want them to be. We've surrendered our desires to God, and we will see what unfolds. If it doesn't work, we will need to deal with the disappointment, because we really do like this other house, but moreover, we will need a renewed outpouring of grace. A closed door will mean more time of waiting to see what happens with the house we currently occupy. There's no progress there to report at all.
"Devout souls delight to look upon those mercies which they have obtained in answer to supplication, for they can see God's especial love in them. When we can name our blessings...'Asked of God,' they will be...dear to us... It is always best to get blessings into our house...by the door of prayer... Even when prayer speeds not, the blessings grow all the richer for the delay..." ~ C. Spurgeon
Trusting this is true. We are watching the "dearness" of His answer increasing as we wait for it to unfold.
"The vision is yet for an appointed time and it hastens to the end and fulfillment; it will not deceive or disappoint. Though it tarry, wait earnestly for it, because it will surely come; it will not be behindhand on its appointed day." Hab 2:3
Trusting that however it works out, it will work out, and we'll be most grateful when the resolution finally comes and we can call something "home" again.
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And, here's the last round of
Oregon Trail: Day 5: Stockton, UT through Idaho to Ontario, OR
398 miles, 7 & 1/4 hours
Idaho rustic:
Open skies, broad lands:
Love the cloud shadows:
A well-watered field:
Almost into Oregon. Maybe this is part of the original Oregon Trail? Who knows?
I do know it is preserved in some spots.
I am in absolute wonder over the land which folks traversed,
and the hardships they endured in search of a place to call "home".
It puts things into perspective.
Once again.
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